


Prompt #46: Still, I remember

by iamleegracey, withxiulay



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 04:16:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8563702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamleegracey/pseuds/iamleegracey, https://archiveofourown.org/users/withxiulay/pseuds/withxiulay
Summary: Yixing gets a shot in a life that should have been his.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Author/s Notes: Here it is! To the prompter, I’m really sorry if this doesn’t reach your expectations. I’m really sorry for the lack of smut (I can’t do it for the life of me). To my beta Y, thank you so much for helping me whenever I get stuck at writing, you’re a very amazing beta! And to the mods, thank you so much for being patient to me. I hope there will be another found for this precious couple.

 

  
****_“Do you... maybe want to go to the prom with me?”_

 

 

_The orange hues of the sunset never looked so perfect before, Yixing thought, not when it was reflected through Minseok’s big eyes; the color perfectly melding with Minseok’s dark brown irises. Yixing swore he could spend the rest of his life staring into those big eyes peering up at him._

 

 

_“Oh. Um, I kind of have a date already…”_

 

 

_Yixing blinked from his dazed stupor as he took in Minseok’s apologetic expression. It took a while for the words to sink in, and the heavy weight of rejection suddenly fell on his shoulders. Disappointment pitted inside him yet he forced a tight lipped smile._

 

 

_“Oh. I see…”_

 

 

_“I’m really sorry, Yixing. Jongdae asked me a few days before.” Minseok smiled sadly and reached for Yixing’s hands before squeezing it gently. Before Yixing could even familiarize himself with the feeling of Minseok’s hands in his, the other let go and left with another apology that Yixing ignored._

 

 

_Yixing swore the sight of the sunset and Minseok’s retreating back was a sight he would never forget in for very long time._

 

 

 

Yixing couldn’t be happier that his shift finally ended.

 

Don’t get him wrong, he loved his job dearly. Being able to save countless lives as a doctor and the adrenaline rush he got from the stressful environment of the emergency room were only a few of the reasons he enjoyed his profession. He loved how rewarding it felt to see a kid smile after crying for hours, how fulfilling it was to see family members let out relieved sighs, and how satisfying it was to hear stable heartbeats from his patients. But there were just some days that drained him too much to the point of a near comatose state. And today was one of them.

 

He tried to deny it, but somehow he partly blamed it on the dream he had last night. How long has it been since he had dreamed of his high school crush and rejection anyway? Yixing couldn’t remember. But somehow, his day immediately went down the drain the moment he opened his eyes.

 

He had, in some way, missed his alarm clock and woke up with only thirty minutes to spare, managed to burn the toast he was going to have for breakfast and forgot to refill the gas of his car the previous night. As soon as he arrived at the hospital, Yixing found out that he was one of the only two doctors on shift that day. It didn’t help that there were tons of patients that day and the new interns assigned to him were clumsy and nerve-wrecked that he almost did all of their work. And somehow the scarcity of doctors stretched up to mid-day duty and Yixing couldn’t help but take over half of the shift to accommodate the steady flow of patients. Time seemed to pass by so slow and Yixing had never been so thankful to see the clock strike ten o’clock.

 

Yixing trudged towards his car after throwing out tired ‘good nights’ and ‘see you tomorrows’, throwing his bag to the back seat as soon as he got in. He was even contemplating ditching work tomorrow, but his strong sense of responsibility guilt him as soon as he started the engine of his car. It took a great amount of effort to keep his eyes open and drive out of the hospital’s parking lot. At least there weren’t any cars around and no traffic jams on his way.

 

A few blocks away from his apartment complex, Yixing halted at a red light and decided to tear his gaze from the road and leaned against the cool glass of his window. His droopy eyes drifted towards the sidewalk where a handful of people were passing by; an elderly couple enjoying a night stroll, high school girls going home probably after stopping by the _noraebang_ nearby, office workers on their way home from an exhausting day at work, a young man that seemed to be closing down a coffee shop.

 

The young man was painfully familiar, and Yixing swore time stopped. Their eyes met and it felt like there was nobody and nothing else around Yixing. He barely registered the loud honking from the car behind his when Yixing could only focus on the familiar man on the sidewalk who was wearing the same shocked expression.

 

“Minseok…?”

 

Everything, from the thrill of seeing your first love to the throb of pain from experiencing your first heartbreak, rushed through Yixing. He stayed rooted, probably looking as unattractive as he was during his teenage years, openly gaping at Minseok.

 

Another honk and Yixing unconsciously stepped on the gas pedal, sending his car lurching forward yet his eyes were still focused on Minseok. Another honk, this time louder, echoed through Yixing’s ears along with the sounds of screeching tires. It was too late, however, when Yixing decided to turn his head for the last thing he saw was a blinding, white light.

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

_Bodies swayed slowly in time with the ballad reverberating through the dimmed gymnasium. In the middle of the makeshift dance floor, Yixing could barely see Minseok. His smile seemingly bright amidst the dimness surrounding them and Yixing would have smiled too, if not for the fact that Minseok’s smiles were caused by Jongdae; Jongdae who was a few days braver than Yixing and managed to ask Minseok to the prom, Jongdae who had his arms wrapped around Minseok’s waist and was whispering to him – probably some lame jokes, Jongdae who’s the sole reason of Minseok’s bright smiles that night._

 

That could have been me.

 

_“That could have been you, you know.”_

 

 

_Yixing sighed as he leaned back on the wall he had been standing against since the night had begun. He then turned towards Sehun who was holding a red cup and offering it to Yixing to which he declined (he was very sure he saw Baekhyun and Chanyeol hovering by the punch area; it’s not impossible they spiked it with something Yixing wouldn’t dare think of)._

 

 

_“That could’ve been you, too, you know.” Yixing smirked and tilted his head towards the other side of the dance floor, where Luhan was being twirled by Jongin. A grin broke out in Yixing’s lips when he heard the unmistakable irritated grunt from Sehun._

 

 

_“Touché. But in my defense, Lu Han and Jongin have been dating for almost a year now. Minseok and Jongdae aren’t. Yet.”_

 

Yet.

 

_Yixing found himself sighing once more as he glanced over where Minseok and Jongdae were, now wrapped in their own intimate bubble. And Yixing couldn’t help but think that Sehun was right; it should have been him in Jongdae’s position, and if he was, then he could’ve been Minseok’s boyfriend._

 

 

 

Yixing felt like he was falling, the pull of gravity so strong that he fell insanely fast. And when he opened his eyes, all he could see was white. Was he dead? If so, then the afterlife reeked just like the hospital Yixing worked at. And just as noisy too. He could hear the faint sounds of hurried footsteps and painful hisses and gut wrenching cries.

 

And afterlife was as painful as waking up with a massive hangover, he thought, as he tried to sit up. The world started to tilt and he was sure he’s going to fall if not for the strong grip on his wrist that seemed to balance him once more. The smell of brewed coffee and fresh bread invaded his nose and then the familiar face of Minseok was all he could see.

 

Did Minseok die too? Or did some deity thought it was funny to have Minseok welcome Yixing in this afterlife?

 

“You know, for a doctor who always lectures me about taking breaks during long shifts, I’d think you of all people would follow what you preach.” Warm hands cupped Yixing’s cheeks and then a pair of soft lips landed on Yixing’s forehead. “Morning, Yixing. I missed you.”

 

Yixing blinked as he let Minseok hug him tightly, as if the latter almost lost him. His hands were suspended in mid-air, body stiff as Minseok buried his face in his neck, and it took all of Yixing’s control not to squirm.

 

“I’m not dead yet, am I?” A chuckle resounded through Minseok before he looked at Yixing and pinched his cheeks gently. He carefully pushed Yixing back on the bed and turned to fuss over things.

 

“Do you think I’d be here if you were dead already?”

 

Yixing wanted to answer yes, but Minseok wouldn’t be here and fussing over him if he were still alive. But he didn’t, he couldn’t, not when he was busy taking in his surroundings. Apparently, he was back at the hospital, inside the staff’s break room. It was still the same day and year, a little past ten; the same time he supposedly saw Minseok closing the coffee shop. The very same time that he was driving home and –

 

“Minseok?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

_Where am I and why are you here?_

 

“What… happened?”

 

Minseok stopped from what he was doing – arranging Yixing’s things – and turned to Yixing with a worried look. Yixing would have easily comforted him if only he knew what was really happening because if he remembered correctly, he hadn’t seen nor talked to Minseok in at least ten years. The last thing he remembered was him driving straight into a blinding white light with the sounds of screeching tires and loud horns echoing through the street.

 

“You passed out again. This is the third time this week Yixing.” Minseok sighed and turned to Yixing once more. “I understand that you’re understaffed for the meantime but just because you’re a doctor doesn’t mean you’re immune to stress and fatigue.”

 

Yixing could only scrunch his brows, his mind trying to absorb everything he was told. It seemed like everything is just as how he remembered his life; he was still a doctor, working in the same toxic hospital. Except that Minseok was here, was genuinely worried like he’d been doing this forever, and he was already carrying Yixing’s bag and things.

 

“Let’s go? The kids are waiting.”

 

_Kids?_

 

“B-but…”

 

“No buts, Dr. Zhang.” Minseok smiled, but his were filled with worry, before he pulled Yixing up the bed. “Kris and Joonmyun have the ER covered for the night, and they said that you could use a day off tomorrow. Don’t worry about the café, Luhan volunteered to close it tonight. You need to rest.”

 

Minseok’s warm hand around his wrist was enough to make Yixing blush like a high school teenager in front of his crush. He forced his limbs to move and prayed it wouldn’t give out on him when Minseok’s smile grew wider amidst the worry in his eyes.

 

“Let’s go home.”

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

Minseok had been giving him furtive glances since they went to the basement parking of the hospital.

 

The 2 row SUV parked in his spot was unfamiliar, and it made Yixing walk off the other direction to look for his trusty old sedan. And then Minseok was pulling him towards the SUV with a worried look but nevertheless remained silent. He even insisted that he drive (even if Yixing didn’t even volunteer to).

 

And when they finally arrived at the apartment block that Yixing lives at, somehow he knew he wouldn’t be walking up the third unit in the top floor of the building. So this time, he let Minseok lead the way. Everything was the same, Yixing observed – from the fading carpets to the rustic elevators – and he was badly tempted to press the button for the 18th floor where his supposed to be unit was, but he let Minseok do that too. Obviously it earned him another curious stare from the other as he pressed the fifth floor button (where most of the units were ideal for small families).

 

The carriage never felt so claustrophobic for Yixing. There was something heavy suspended in the air and it was making Yixing dizzy once more. Was he really dead? Or is this some sort of a half-life hallucination? Or maybe this is all in his head. He wanted to ask Minseok so badly, his eyes boring holes through the other that he was sure Minseok could feel his heavy gaze.

 

The doors opened and Minseok stepped out, yet there was still that dense atmosphere between them. Their footsteps quietly echoed through the winding hallway until they reached the unit at the end of. Minseok wordlessly opened the door placing Yixing’s things on the side table before walking inside. Yixing stood motionlessly in front of the door, contemplating whether to enter or not.

 

He could faintly hear someone bidding goodbye to Minseok and he forced himself to step inside the house, crouching to take off his shoes. Yixing almost yelped when he saw a young man – probably in his late teenage years – walking straight towards him and eyes solely locked on the phone on his hands.

 

“E-excuse me…?”

 

“Oh, hello Dr. Zhang. The kids are already asleep, unfortunately.” The young man looked up and flashed a boxy smile at Yixing, and something was so familiar with the kid. “Xiumei was a bit sad though, she was expecting you to pick her up from the daycare. Well, anyway, see you around Dr. Zhang. And appa wants me to remind you about this weekend.”

 

Yixing blinked as the kid waved goodbye and slipped on his shoes before going out of the door, another thousand or so questions running through his mind. Did he just say kids? And who was this Xiumei and why would he fetch her from the daycare? Halfway through walking inside the dimly lit house, Yixing finally realized where he saw that familiar smile from.

 

Byun Baekhyun.

 

Could he be Byun Baekhyun’s son in this…whatever dimension or dream he was in? But Baekhyun didn’t live in this apartment complex. If he had, Yixing would’ve known. After all, it was hard to ignore Byun Baekhyun amongst people. But then again, Minseok shouldn’t be living in this apartment complex too, especially not with Yixing.

 

He shook his head, trying to clear his mind and push away the headache that was threatening to form, and found himself walking towards the sofa and plopping down on it. Fatigue seemed to finally take a toll on his body and Yixing could only succumb to it, closing his eyes and taking a deep breathe.

 

Was he really dead?

 

Warm hands soon started rubbing his temples and he forced himself not to jump away from the warm touch. His head tilted upwards against his protests and his eyes were soon drowned in pools of brown that sent shivers up his spine.

 

Even after all these years, Kim Minseok still had that kind of effect on him.

 

“I’m guessing you haven’t eaten dinner yet,” Minseok said, his fingers now trailing towards his neck and ending on his shoulders. Yixing couldn’t help but let out a soft sigh when he felt those fingers untangling the knots in his shoulders as though they have been doing it for a very long time already.

 

“I…I did. I think.”

 

Minseok sighed before he walked around and knelt in front of Yixing, eyes twinkling with curiosity as he tilted his head.

 

“Hey Minseok, that kid from earlier. Whose son is he again and what is he doing here?”

 

Minseok blinked at Yixing once more before he chuckled – a melodic sound that made his heart skip a beat. How Minseok could elicit such a reaction from Yixing, he could never understand.

 

“Taehyung? He’s Baekhyun’s son and he always babysits our children. I positively feel like there’s something different about you. Are you really feeling okay?”

 

_Well, you definitely haven‘t been a part of my life for the past ten years. I’m not sure if you being here right now is supposed to be okay._

 

“Y-Yeah. I’m fine.” Yixing flashed a smile and he could have never expected Minseok to return the gesture with a smile of his own. He could definitely get used to this.

 

“Taehyung told me that Xiumei was disappointed in you for not fetching her from daycare earlier. Did you promise her again?”

 

_Who’s Xiumei?_

 

Minseok sighed and looked at Yixing with worried eyes once more. Yixing felt something heavy settle inside him, and by the looks of it, this broken promise to whoever this Xiumei was wasn’t a one-time thing.

 

“Minseok?”

 

“You have to stop promising the kids about things you can’t do, Yixing.” Minseok let out a sigh, something that only seemed to bury Yixing more into this heavy feeling inside him. Was it guilt?

 

“I’m sorry…?”

 

“You should say that to the kids, not to me. Now come, I’ve prepared a bath for you, dear husband.” The teasing tone that Minseok used in his statement was quickly lost to Yixing.

 

Husband?

 

Now this is getting more interesting.

 

Yixing found himself looking at his ring finger where indeed a plain gold ring was resting. Not only did he get to live with Minseok, they seemed to have kids and gotten married. Somehow, Yixing knew it wasn’t the icing on the cake. Maybe he should just deal with it later after taking this bath.

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

_“Have you heard?” Sehun drawled as he plopped beside Yixing during lunch break. Yixing grunted, not even looking at his friend as he ate his lunch while cramming a homework he had forgotten to do last night._

 

 

_“If this is about Baekhyun and Chanyeol getting detention because they spiked the drinks during prom then yes I’ve heard of it.”_

 

 

_“No. Everyone already predicted that happening.” Sehun said as he nudged Yixing. “This news I’m going to tell you is so new that you’ll be the second person after me to know.”_

 

 

_Yixing sighed and decided to spare Sehun a glance._

 

 

_“If this is some kind of a joke–”_

 

 

_“Guess who’s Jongdae’s new boyfriend.”_

 

 

_Yixing felt all the blood drain from his body as he stared at Sehun, trying to look for any trace that the latter’s just messing with him._

 

 

_“You’re…you’re kidding, right?”_

 

 

_And as if on cue, the cafeteria seemed to quiet down a bit. Almost everyone’s eyes were on the newcomers by the entrance._

 

 

_“Why don’t you see it for yourself.” Yixing tried not to turn towards where most of the students were looking at, but curiosity had always been his weakness. He caught sight of Jongdae and Minseok just in time to see them approaching the table where most of Jongdae’s friends were, their hands intertwined with smiles rivalling that of the sun’s bright rays._

 

 

_Yixing then realized that the once elated feeling that Minseok’s smiles brought to him were now replaced with pain and heart break._

 

 

 

 

 

The next time he opened his eyes, Yixing saw a headful of unruly hair tickling his chin and one of his arms numb.

 

It felt so natural, how Minseok fit perfectly against him and how waking up with the sight of Minseok made Yixing’s day already complete. His hand suddenly moved to cup Minseok’s cheek and it made the latter stir from his sleep. What price did Yixing have to pay to experience this for the rest of his life?

 

“Morning…” The word never sounded so perfect to Yixing before despite the raspy voice that Minseok had. Minseok finally opened his eyes and smiled, and Yixing swore it was even brighter and warmer than the rays of sunshine slipping through their room. And just when Yixing thought that his day couldn’t get any perfect, Minseok suddenly leaned up and placed a chaste kiss on Yixing’s lips. “Did you miss me?”

 

If this was how it felt like to die, then he’d wish to die over and over again to feel those lush lips against his own.

 

Don’t get him wrong, Yixing had his fair share of excellent kisses – some of them not even close to being chaste – but this exceptionally innocent one exceeded all of them so far, and it might be because it came from Minseok. And Yixing couldn’t help but lean in for some more of those kisses because, hey, Minseok was his husband in this dream after all.

 

“We should get up…I need to open the café soon and the kids might be awake.” Minseok giggled after their nth kiss and Yixing had half a mind to blurt out the question that his hazy mind procured.

 

“What kids…?”

 

As if on cue, tiny footsteps echoed outside the hallway and the door to their room suddenly opened, letting two toddlers – a boy and a girl – gleefully run towards the bed.

 

“Those kids.” Minseok chuckled as he disentangled himself from Yixing and stood from the bed before carrying the little boy and placing him on the bed. The little girl however climbed up the bed and perched herself on Yixing’s torso while squealing excitedly.

 

“ _Baba_! You’re still here; are you not going to work today?” The little girl asked as she looked at Yixing with painfully familiar eyes, smiling widely and showing her two missing front teeth. The little boy however, gurgled, having a pacifier in his mouth and during this time, Yixing was already praying that Minseok wouldn’t leave him alone with these kids. After all, Yixing had never been good with children despite his profession as a doctor.

 

“No Xiumei, _baba_ doesn’t have work today. You and Jun can get to spend a whole day with him today.” Minseok supplied as he took his towel and necessities from the nearby dresser. And then he turned towards the nearby bathroom and Yixing knew he was doomed. The loud squeals that the little girl emitted sealed Yixing’s fate.

 

Well, it was inevitable, after all they were his kids. And judging from the conversation Yixing had with Minseok and that babysitter from last night, Yixing hadn’t spent lots of time with these little kids – _his_ kids. So Yixing thought that for a start, he should try to get to know them without being obvious about it. Somehow having to spend a whole day with the kids now seemed to be a blessing in disguise.

 

Yixing decided to scrutinize their looks first. They weren’t that old, he thought, since the little girl barely reached the bed and the little boy had to be scooped up by Minseok. The little girl – Xiumei – looked a little bit over five years old and was a spitting image of Yixing, from the droopy eyes to the tall nose and dimpled smile and curly brown hair still unruly from sleep. It was no doubt that this girl was his daughter.

 

The little boy however was a different story.

 

Yixing thinks the little boy – Jun – was barely three years old, with wide eyes that he was sure wasn’t in any way similar to his, chubby cheeks and a pair of pouty lips. And if Yixing looked closely enough, he would say this kid looked exactly like Minseok.

 

“ _Baba_! _Baba_ can we go to the park today? You promised me last time we’d play at the park.” Xiumei bounced on his torso, making Yixing gasp for breath once more as she playfully squished Yixing’s cheeks. Jun, on the other hand, started crawling up his leg before curling like a kitten on Yixing’s thigh.

 

“Ah, maybe we should ask your…appa?” Yixing said with uncertainty and it seemed to satisfy the little girl.

 

“Alright. And then maybe we could go to appa’s café and ask Lulu oppa for some cupcakes!” Xiumei squealed, her dimples making an appearance and it made Yixing’s insides warm. Like he wanted to give the world to her just so he could always see her smile. “But right now, I need to eat baba. Can you make me and Jun some breakfast?”

 

Xiumei jumped down on the bed and only then did Yixing finally breathe comfortably. Maybe he should use this time to get to know the kids more since it didn’t look like Minseok was going to finish taking a bath any time soon.

 

But the idea was quickly weighed out by the thought of what breakfast should he prepare for Xiumei and Jun aside from his very extensive knowledge on toasts and PB&J sandwiches. Add to the fact that he clearly had no idea where the kitchen was as well as the utensils. It would only give way to more suspicions.

 

Having decided, Yixing smiled at Jun and scooped him up in his arms which earned him a happy statement full of gibberish words, before following Xiumei out of the room. Maybe now was the best time to inspect the house without looking suspicious. But all his plans were quickly shot down when he saw Xiumei by the living room, happily humming as she colored some books amidst the mess she had made on the floor. Tumbled boxes of toys were all around the living room, with its contents scattered hazardously on the floor. Different coloring books were lying on the floor along with coloring materials and Yixing almost stepped on one sharp red Crayola.

 

“ _Baba_! Come color with me!” Xiumei hummed, never even looking at Yixing as she concentrated on coloring what seemed like ponies in a shocking color of neon green.

 

Was this how he was going to spend the whole day? Cleaning up after the kids? Yixing could only sigh as he carefully placed Jun down the floor and thanked all the deities around that the kid didn’t only look like Minseok but also inherited his meekness.

 

“Xiumei, you shouldn’t leave things on the floor.” Yixing gently scolded the kid before turning towards Jun with a smile. “How about you help me clean up after your _jiejie’s_ mess?”

 

Before the kid could reply though, a soft giggle from behind startled Yixing and made him turn. He saw Minseok clad with only a towel snugly wrapped around his waist and hair still dripping wet. Droplets of water slowly rolled along the expanse of Minseok’s exposed chest and made its way down his chiseled abs only to end up absorbed on the towel.

 

Now Yixing thought his day was more than complete.

 

“Are you sure you’ll be okay being alone with them?” Minseok asked as he went over the dresser and bent over it, showing off his perfect behind up in the air and in perfect view of Yixing. Yixing found himself swallowing hard, his throat suddenly dry and ears blocking out whatever Minseok was saying. His eyes followed every movement, every stretch of muscle as Minseok dressed himself with a white button up that clearly showcased his arms and a fitted pair of black slacks that hugged his thighs and ass perfectly.

 

This must be his reward for saving hundreds of lives when he was still alive.

 

He only woke up from his trance when Minseok approached him and flicked his forehead gently.

 

“You’re so perverted. Are you really sure you can handle the kids today? They can be quite a handful. I can always bring them to the café or ask Taehyung to baby sit them while you rest.” Minseok chuckled as he cupped Yixing’s cheeks and placed a soft kiss on his lips that rendered the latter senseless again.

 

“Y-yeah. We’ll be okay.” Yixing muttered and glanced over the kids who were now together on the coffee table, with Jun carelessly scratching a crayon on a piece of paper and Xiumei still coloring the picture on her coloring book seriously.

 

“Alright. Please clean up the mess, will you? I’ll whip up some breakfast for you guys.”

 

Needless to say, it took Yixing longer than normal to clean up the mess, not when he could clearly see Minseok (and his perfect ass) working in the kitchen.

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

“Don’t miss me too much, Minseok,” Yixing teasingly said, making Minseok chuckle. One more kiss on Yixing’s lips and he was gone and as soon as the door closed, Yixing knew he was in hell.

 

For some unknown reason, Jun started crying and Xiumei started messing up the toys that Yixing cleaned up earlier. It made him want to call for Minseok quickly but refused at the last minute. Wouldn’t that just raise suspicions?

 

It took him nearly an hour and a stubbed toe (from stepping on a toy lying on the floor) before Yixing finally managed to make the kid stop crying (solely due to the television being turned on). After that, Yixing urged Xiumei to clean up the toys she wasn’t playing with in exchange to stopping by at the café where Minseok was working later in the afternoon. Yixing could only hope that Minseok was working in the same café he always passed by on the way to work.

 

After another hour or so, Yixing barely had the time to lounge on the sofa after helping Xiumei clean before he realized it was already lunch time. He was thankful that there were enough ingredients to make a simple meal of _bibimbap_ for the three of them.

 

Lunch passed by and Yixing found himself feeding the children more than himself. Of course, it was messy and somehow both Xiumei and Jun managed to dirty themselves with their food. Yixing sighed as he tried to wipe off some food off of their clothes but knew it was useless anyway. He found himself sighing as he scooped up the kids and decided that it was bath time.

 

Apparently, that was the biggest mistake he ever did that day.

 

Bath time was hellish. The kids couldn’t stop squirming and playing and splashing water that it ended up with Yixing thoroughly soaked as well. But he couldn’t even find it himself to get angry, not when he saw how Xiumei and Jun laughed as if there was no tomorrow. He couldn’t help but let himself loosen up and play with Xiumei and Jun.

 

The feeling was greater than what he usually felt after saving a patient from imminent danger.

 

The bath took longer than it should have and a few moments later, Yixing faced yet another crisis: dressing up Jun.

 

The little boy seemed to dislike the idea of wearing clothes and tried to get away from Yixing as hard as he could, giving yet another challenge for the already tired doctor. And with the help of Xiumei, he managed to corner the kid and quickly slipped his shirt and shorts on him.

 

Nap time came unexpectedly and yet Yixing was thankful for it.

 

He was in the middle of washing up the dishes when the house suddenly seemed quiet except for the television that blared out some nursery rhyme. And based on personal experiences, kids suddenly being quiet meant they were up to no good, so Yixing quickly checked up on them. What he saw made him smile softly, for there in the middle of the room were Xiumei and Jun, snoozing peacefully while curled around each other.

 

He couldn’t stop himself from approaching the kids and tucking them gently, shifting them so they could sleep comfortably. Just when he was about to go back and finish the dishes, his eyes caught sight of the stacked photo albums underneath the coffee table. And since he was always curious, he found himself sitting beside the sleeping kids and took one album from the pile.

 

A shiver went up Yixing’s spine as soon as he opened the album, his eyes scanning the old photo carefully preserved. He was in the photo, albeit younger and wearing the suit he wore during his senior prom. It shouldn’t have been peculiar, if not for the fact that he was beside Minseok.

 

He was sure he was dateless during prom and that Minseok went with Jongdae.

 

Yixing flipped to the next page, and the page after that and another after that. It showed all the memories he had since high school – his high school graduation, his family vacation in Jeju Island that summer before college, frat parties and college graduation. Even the time he passed his internship and medical licensure exams, as well as his first day officially as a medical practitioner. Everything was just how it should be.

 

Except Minseok was there in every single photo.

 

Another page was turned and this time, Yixing was unfamiliar with the scenes it showcased. A trip to a European country side. A kiss under the stars. A loving hug on a balcony overviewing a beautiful sunrise.

 

An intimate wedding by the sea dated seven years ago.

 

As Yixing turned over the pages of the photo album, he seemed to be watching a movie – a movie that showed what his life would have been. From first dates to tearful proposals, Xiumei’s birth and Jun’s first birthday – everything was documented in the book.

 

Yixing’s life was near perfect as exhibited in the photos.

 

There were still pages void of photos, as if waiting to be filled with more memories and Yixing wanted to experience first-hand. To be the one taking the photo and placing it delicately inside the photo album to be viewed in the future.

 

_Would it be a sin to wish this reality I’m in would never end?_

 

Just as he reached the last photo on the album – ironically a photo of him and his so called family that would have been taken just recently – Xiumei stirred from her sleep, effectively interrupting his thoughts.

 

“ _Baba_? Can we go to the park now?”

 

Yixing chuckled and gently closed the photo album before caressing the little girl’s cheek.

 

Maybe he should start making more memories, and the best way to start is to spend some more time with his kids.

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

The weather was just perfectly fine for a stroll in a park.

 

Yixing had always disliked going to parks, after all it was where he had gotten his first and only heart break from Minseok’s rejection way back in high school. Other than that, there was always something so nostalgic about parks. It was probably the idea of a fleeting childhood that would never come back, or the innocence that only children playing in the park possessed. It only made Yixing reminisce about regrets whenever he passed by parks.

 

But at that time, every single perception he had about parks vanished as he carefully pushed Xiumei on the swing, hearing her heavenly laughter as Jun whined to take his turn.

 

Somehow the usual memories tainted with parks were replaced with bright and precious ones, the likes of his daughter’s laughter and his son’s playtime at the sandbox. It made him want to spend more afternoons in parks just so he could see their precious smiles and heavenly laughter. Yixing definitely didn’t want to go back to his solitary life full of regrets and what ifs after experiencing just a day having Minseok and the kids.

 

It was these small things that made life so fulfilling.

 

But he should have known that all good things came to an end, and it came in the form of a promise he himself made with Xiumei earlier.

 

The sun was barely setting when Xiumei decided that Yixing should fulfil his promise. His feet seemed to know the way towards the café Minseok was working at, the very café that he remembered passing by last night before the blinding white light –

 

_No._

 

Yixing shook his head, clearing his mind off the thoughts by letting Xiumei’s song ring in his ears. He focused on the fact that he was holding hands with both of his kids while they were on their way towards where his husband was working. He had a family now, and he never wanted to return to being a regretful and lonely doctor who might or might not have been involved in an accident.

 

He didn’t want to think that he was on his way to his death and this was just a phase, a final brain activity before his body gave in and passed on.

 

They finally stopped, standing directly in front of the café where Minseok was working and was only separated by the fairly quiet road. There was something amiss, somewhat a heavy atmosphere that made Yixing restless. A shiver of fright suddenly overcame Yixing as soon as he realized where he was.

 

This was where he was driving last night.

 

Through the window, he could see Minseok serving a table and their eyes briefly met. The surprised smile that Minseok flashed him did nothing to calm Yixing’s nerves. He barely even realized that Jun already let go of his hand and started running across the street. It wouldn’t have been a problem if not for the approaching car speedily running straight towards Jun.

 

Yixing’s nerves went numb, running halfway towards the street and his heart seemed to stop at the sight of Jun freezing in the middle of the road and the look of horror on Minseok’s face from the other side. He didn’t know how it happened, but Yixing found himself running halfway across the street and pushing Jun to safety just in time.

 

And then there was that blinding flash of white light accompanied by screeching tires and loud horns once more.

 

 

\-----

 

 

 

_Graduation rolled by so fast, and Yixing barely even realized that it might be the last time he would see Minseok._

 

 

_But it wasn’t like he could approach the guy, what with Jongdae always hovering around Minseok. Fat chance that Yixing could talk to Minseok and chat like an old friend, not an admirer that was rejected one fateful afternoon._

 

 

_Yet it seemed like destiny was making a way for Yixing to talk to Minseok._

 

 

_That afternoon, a day just before graduation, Yixing just finished packing all of his things from his locker after his final meeting with the members of the school’s chorale. The school was nearly empty, and the usually crowded and noisy halls were sentimentally quiet that afternoon. His soft footsteps echoed through the walls and it was the only sound he could hear, until he turned to the corner leading to the school’s exit._

 

 

_Soft sobs were bouncing through the walls and with a glance, Yixing saw Minseok by the end of the hallway, sitting by himself and crying._

 

 

_It made Yixing halt his steps and hide behind the wall with his heart hammering against his chest. Why was Minseok crying? Where was Jongdae? Should he approach Minseok?_

 

 

_There were countless moments when Yixing would step forward only to back off once more as the sobs continued to emanate from the hallway. And when he finally had the courage to step forward, the sobs already stopped and Jongdae was in front of Minseok once more, cradling him in a loving hug that Yixing would’ve given him._

 

 

_That afternoon was the most regretful afternoon that Yixing had ever experienced in his entire life._

 

 

 

He felt numb once more. His limbs were heavy and his head felt like it was going to crack into two. His throat was dry and it took a great deal of effort to open his eyes. He could barely hear the commotions around him as he tried to recall the last thing that happened.

 

_Coffee shop._

 

 

_Car accident._

 

 

_White light._

 

 

_Minseok._

 

 

_Husband._

 

 

_Xiumei and Jun._

 

Jun.

 

Yixing quickly jolted, his eyes opening wide and heart hammering so fast he found himself panting hard. Various beeps and frantic footsteps rang loudly in his ears and only then did he notice the white walls surrounding him. Numerous tubes were attached on him and before he could move his hands, nurses were already by his side, trying to calm him down.

 

“Damn it, Zhang. When I said ‘see you tomorrow’ yesterday, I didn’t mean in this state.” Kris suddenly appeared in front of him, checking him as if he was a patient. “You’re one hell of a fighter, dude. Almost everyone was on edge for the past twenty four hours.”

 

Twenty four hours?

 

Kris scribbled on his clipboard before looking at Yixing.

 

“Standard procedures. Do you feel heavy in any of your limbs?”

 

Yixing blinked and tried to move his fingers and toes. He didn’t know if he should be relieved that he can do so without any glitch. Kris let out a thankful sigh before he proceeded.

 

"What was the last thing you remember?”

 

With difficulty, Yixing tried to open his mouth and winced when he felt the dryness of his mouth and hoarseness of his voice.

 

“I…I was crossing the street…my son… is he okay?”

 

Kris raised an amused eyebrow before he scribbled on his clipboard once more. Somehow Yixing had a feeling that his colleague didn’t entirely believe him. He received a hum from the tall doctor as he flipped over the next sheet on his clipboard but he decided it was worth the shot.

 

“My husband…where’s my husband?”

 

Kris stopped writing for a while before he looked at Yixing and sighed. He took a step closer and the blank expression on his face sent a heavy weight in the pits of Yixing’s stomach.

 

“Yixing…you don’t have a husband. Not that we know of at least.” Kris muttered as softly as he could. Yixing wanted to disagree strongly, to tell Kris that he could end the prank and let his family in. But he couldn’t, because while Kris might be a funny person outside work, he wouldn’t dare prank him in his current state. Yixing frantically glanced over his ring finger only to find it vacant of any wedding ring.

 

“What…what do you mean?”

 

“You were involved in a car accident yesterday night, Yixing. A sleepy truck driver momentarily lapsed and crossed over your lane. You’ve been in comatose for the past twenty four hours.”

 

No. No, no, no. It felt all too genuine. Minseok’s kisses and Xiumei’s laughter and Jun’s hugs. It’s all too real to be just a figment of his comatose induced mid.

 

“You’re lying.”

 

“I’m sorry Yixing. I suggest you try to stay awake for the next twelve hours for precautionary measures and observations. I’ll try to keep you company during my breaks.” Kris offered a sympathetic smile that did nothing to comfort Yixing. He watched as Kris turned and headed to the door only to stop halfway and turn to him. “By the way, there’s this guy, the one who called the ambulance yesterday. He never left the hospital until this morning when I personally assured to contact him once you woke up. Said he knew you from high school.”

 

And then, just like that, a small hope arose inside Yixing. Didn’t he see Minseok just before the collision happened? His heart started beating hard, so hard he barely heard Kris taking his leave. Could it be?

 

Barely a minute passed before the doors suddenly opened making Yixing turn, thinking it was just one of the nurses making additional check-ups.

 

“Oh my god.”

 

How wrong was he.

 

His heart skipped a beat as he saw Minseok wearing the same white button up and black slacks he wore the last time he saw him, panting hard and eyes wide with tears brimming in the edges. He took shaky steps towards Yixing as the latter remained motionless, contemplating if this was really happening. Step after step and Yixing found himself smiling softly at Minseok.

 

“I’m…not dead yet, am I?”

 

A chuckle amidst tears erupted from Minseok, and a sense of déjà vu overcame Yixing. Somehow he already predicted what Minseok’s answer would be.

 

“Do you think I’d be here if you were dead already?”

 

Yixing’s smile widened just as Minseok was standing directly in front of him, just a few inches separating them. And before Yixing could stop himself, he opened his mouth and uttered the words itching to be let out.

 

“Morning, Minseok. Did you miss me?”

 

 

\-----

 

 

 


End file.
